Perception

The word perception comes from the latin word percepio - meaning "receiving collecting, apprehension with the mind of sensing". The other day i was in a party surrounded by my close friends, during the conversation i tried to recall an old colleague of ours, and i said "Guyz do you remember John ?", as my friends were responding, an unsual sense of understanding started to descend, a simple question like this can lead to such a interesting thought process was something i never imagined,

Jane responded "Oh the quiet one ?"
Samantha queried "Hmm the fair one ?"
Jack quipped "Ah the one with great forward defensive stroke !?"
Adrian inquired "One who always preffered TAZO tea over any other brand ?"
"The romantic guy ?"
"The loner ??"
"The one who had hots for Jemma ?"......

I said, "Guys guys !, all of you may be correct and may be wrong at the same time, he could be the same John or a different person we are talking about" , however i came to realise that say if he is the same person that all of us are describing, how everybody has a very different perception of him and at times at stark contrasts too !, i feel inorder to say some one "the quiet type" one must have attempted to have a conversation more than once ! and to say "the fair one" means they never walked up to the person at all ! but still everybody has a image of this person John, and this image is a strong one.

Its a natural tendency of human beings to correlate and juxtapose different scenarios to come to a conclusion and all of this happens automatically at the subconscious, but i feel if i really want to see what a statue at the centre of the crossroads looks like , i would have to take a walk around it, and not just view it from the road i am standing on, so one should always try to get a more comprehensive picture because it not just helps you understand a person better it also helps you learn so many new facets of his life. Spending time with some one is a important tool i guess, esp with those who you feel are important in your life, always put yourselves in different situations, some life will throw at you and you wouldnt have a choice but to be in them :) , some you should create of your own :) to know how he/she reacts or more importantly how you thought you would have reacted to this new situation. It will be fun ! and i hope your perception about me has evolved ? :)

Agree to Disagree ?

The art of disagreeing, ...... ...... .. The art of disagreeing ???, when did nodding your head sideways became an art ? Amusing it might be , but its true. Do you know people at times get into arguments just for the heck of it, they may not be backing a serious issue which is close to their heart but still they like to get into conversations which lead to more than just altercations. Why do they do that ?, in most cases its the ego that "ecomes" between the man and his self image. So the party involved in the heated argument is more concerned by the fact "How can i go wrong ?" "How can he/she find any mistake in my argument ?" "I know his pedigree, he doesnt have the right to be right! " :) .. we lose the focus on the topic at hand, though we may be right by arguing "for" our argument but still we need to consider the following if we need to evolve and grow more mature in our daily public dealings.

The person in front who has dared to come up against your "opinion" is NOT an empty TIN CAN and nor is he representing any company who sells any of those EMPTY TIN CANS. Why am i suggesting you take such a drastic view ? because like you even a TIN CAN needs R:E:S:P:E:C:T. and i would like you to give him some by NOT considering him a .. a TIN CAN. well ofcourse he can be the tin can you have always liked to play mental games with ... but .. but .. if you hold this stand of giving some respect to the individual you will see "where is he coming from" . He may be wrong but you need to know what premise did he based his "wrong" conclusion upon. Because if you probe with a few encouraging questions you will eventually know the premise of his "logical deduction" , how will that help ? One it helps by reducing the tension in the air, Two you give him respect by taking active interest in his "thought process", three if you now still feel that the premise on which he has based his conclusion is at fault, i would recommend you to attack the premise, and by attack i mean ask him to strengthen his foundation in accordance to you "still probing questions " For example if you dont like ascending ordered list of things, dont push your new list in his face instead go like "what do you think one stands to gain by having a ascending ordered list ?".
Most people if you feel were on a "wrong side" of an argument give away at this test, and now convincing them about your version of the argument is more automatic in nature, and no blood is spilled, the swords are not drawn. :)